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Help for viewing Patches
Place pages is available at our Help
Page.
- Who
is Patches?
- How
did you get the name "Patches?"
- Are
you selling a video of yourself?
- Do
you have a printed catalog?
- Where
can I find a description of your videos?
- Are
any of your videos available in PAL format?
- When
are you going to make more videos?
- Can
videos be sent to Canada?
- Are
the "squirting" scenes in videos from In Joe's Living
Room the same as peeing?
- Do
you also have nude pictures available?
- Is
there any place where groups of people interested in watersports
can meet together?
- Why
did you set up this Web site?
- Do
you have your own domain name now?
- What
stories are available here?
- Are
the stories you have written true?
- Have
you ever had a pissing contest?
- Is
there anything you haven't done?
- What
was your major at school?
- When
is your birthday so I can send you a card?
Who
is Patches?
I'm a girl who just started my career after getting married
in June 1996 and graduating from college in May 1996. Running
this Web site is a sideline for me. I prefer to remain anonymous
so I have the freedom to express myself openly in various
alt.sex.* newsgroups without the fear that I may be recognized
by friends or family or in my professional career.
How
did you get the name "Patches?"
I picked my fictitious name because I like watermelon patches,
and patches of grass, but my husband (my boyfriend when
Patches' Place started) likes wet patches. I will let your
imagination figure out what watermelon patches and patches
of grass are for but the reference to "wet patches" is the
dark, stained area on my clothes when I wet my pants. Watching
the expanding wet area in my pants as I wet them is a big
turn-on for my husband and something I enjoy very much also.
To keep it short, I dropped the "wet" and began referring
to myself as Patches in all my posts in newsgroups and in
e-mail when I began making myself known on the Internet
in November 1994.
My stories refer first to my boyfriend and later to my fiance
as I related some of our early adventures together. Maybe
one day I will write additional stories about my husband
and I but after starting the Patches' Place Web site in
early 1995, any spare time went into developing our Web
site and selling videos. Early on, I asked him what he would
like to be called in the stories I wrote about our watersports
activities. After reflecting a couple of seconds he said,
"Call me Peter Pan because I never want to grow up!" He
enjoys watersports with me and associates the act of wetting
himself as something childish. But he loves acting childish
and like Peter Pan, he would like to fly around Never-Never
Land with me forever. It is hard to imagine "forever" but
I can imagine a "Golden" wedding anniversary!
A name like "Peter Pan" needed to be shortened so I briefly
considered "PeePan" but rejected it after considering how
often I would have to explain that name! ;-) Then the initials
"P.P." seemed like a good possibility and Tinker suggested
I keep the same sound but make his name "Pi-Pi" which is
French for a certain human bodily function which cannot
be named according to the CDA. That sounded good to me and
so I began referring to him as Pi-Pi.
While I was still in college, we needed a name for my roommate.
One Saturday night the four of us were standing around the
kitchen at our apartment discussing various names for my
roommate and her boyfriend. We were getting a light snack
to eat at the time and we were nuking some "Hot Pockets"
we picked up at the store.
While waiting for the microwave to finish its cycle, my
roommate's boyfriend was cuddling my roommate by reaching
around from behind her and putting his hands down into the
front pockets of her blue jeans. She just stood still and
didn't resist but asked him in a rather annoyed voice, "And
what are you looking for?" To which he replied, "I'm just
looking for some hot pockets that are good enough to eat.
I'm starved!" Without blinking an eye, she just let go of
a flood like she did at one point on our video and said
matter-of-factly, "There's some hot pockets for you. Eat'em
up!"
He didn't laugh, at least not at first, and somehow she
managed to keep a straight face. But Pi-Pi and I laughed
so hard tears were running down our faces. It was a hilarious
sight, especially the expression on his face as he pulled
his hands out of her pockets and looked at his wet fingers.
So she is known as "Pockets." I dropped the ""Hot" just
to keep it simpler in my stories.
We came up with a name for Pocket's boyfriend a few weeks
later. The name emerged from an e-mail conversation on the
Net which had nothing to do with watersports. We decided
to call him "Runken" which is a Norwegian word for a "stroking
motion" he likes to do over and over while watching our
video. (grin) I was later told that the name Runken was
not the correct word in Norwegian for this activity but
the name stuck.
Are
you selling a video of yourself?
Actually, we have two videos we produced and are selling.
They are not just of me. Pockets and I are in the first
one and others are in the second which we refer to as Patches'
Bloopers. We also have other videos which were made In
Joe's Living Room where we collaborated on the scenes
which we also sell in Patches' Parlor (available from our
Videos page).
We also market amateur videos from other producers. Our
videos feature a watersports theme. Since the term watersports
is used in so many different ways, we distinguish our videos
from golden showers and enemas by referring to them as non-extreme
golden fantasies since wet clothing is the main focus. The
videos from In Joe's Living Room have a squirting
theme. Squirting can be defined as "expelling the secretions
of the paraurethral glands." We have another online catalog
in Nissy's Naughty Nook but squirting does not
mean the same thing there as you can probably figure out
for yourself. In December 1996, we added a new line of videos
which we call Watersports for Lovers and
is intended as an educational tool for couples who would
like to try watersports or get some ideas for watersports
activities they might like to try. Then in January 1997,
we added two catalog pages from Raysco called Golden Fantasies
and Wet Amateurs. We have also had a marketing agreement
with Wet Set Magazine which
allows us to market their videos and Debbie Ashton videos
in NTSC format. We expect to add other amateur adult video
lines in the future.
Do
you have a printed catalog?
No, not at this time. We do not want the expense of designing,
printing, and mailing catalogs which is why we use the Internet
to alert people to what we have to offer. Since information
about Patches' Place appeared in the August 1995 issue of
Wet Set Magazine, we have gotten requests for information
and catalogs by regular mail. We have a flyer we send out
in response to mail requests but it does not contain as
much info as our Web pages do.
Where
can I find a description of your videos?
Descriptions of our videos and those from other amateur
video makers are available in Patches' Blue Room.
Are
any of your videos available in PAL format?
After many efforts to make our videos available in PAL format,
we finally reached an agreement with Wet Set Magazine in
August 1996 to cross market our Patches' videos and Nissy's
videos in PAL format and the Debbie Ashton videos from New
Zealand in NTSC format. We have now begun to explore the
possibility of marketing a couple of the most popular IJLR
videos in PAL format through Wet Set. This may happen in
the spring of 1997.
When
are you going to make more videos?
I don't plan to release any more videos with me in them.
I went though a complete make over to change my appearance
after Patches 1 was released and so did Pockets. We felt
this was necessary to protect our identity in case anyone
saw us in real life who had seen our video. We released
Patches 2 with Elizabeth in November 1995 which was her
first watersports video. She discovered she liked being
naughty and went through a wild period like I did which
I described in my early watersports experiences. She experienced
that exhilarating feeling of freedom that comes from not
having to find a bathroom every few hours.
She talked her friend, Sunny, into making a watersports
video with her and this was released as Patches 3 in January
1996.
Elizabeth discovered wearing wet panties and hiding it under
her dress or skirt could be fun and a real turn on. She
came up with some scenes that were totally wild and wacky
and these scenes were released as Patches 4 in June 1996.
We did not release any more videos until December 1996 as
we worked through all the start-up issues with Wet Set Magazine
for making our videos and Nissy's videos available in PAL
format and marketing Debbie Ashton videos in NTSC format.
After releasing "Let the Games Begin in December 1996, we
expect to release several more in the Watersports for Lovers
series in the first half of 1997. We also hope to do more
videos in the Patches series but we have no plans to release
any in the first half of 1997.
Can
videos be sent to Canada?
Videos from Patches Parlor and the other amateur video makers
have been sent to Canada until June 1996 with no problems.
Canadian customs have been fairly strict about what adult
entertainment products can enter their country and they
just got a lot stricter in the spring of 1996. One of our
videos was confiscated by Canadian customs in June 1996.
Another was confiscated in July 1996. While we don't believe
any of our Patches videos are illegal in most of Canada,
there may be locals laws in some communities which outlaw
them. We believe our Patches videos are more humorous and
educational than sexually oriented even though they are
definitely adult material. We suspect Canadian customs agents
have not seen anything like what we offer and they were
confused about what their own laws allow. To a bureaucrat's
mind, something that is fun must be against the law! We
have a mental image of customs agents taking turns going
to a back office where they can "privately study" our videos
to "learn more" from materials taken from a customer! Confiscation
is just another word for stealing what does not belong to
you.
We have had discussions with a number of video distributors
as we try to find ways to ship our videos from within Canada
and avoid the problem with customs at the border. We have
not been successful in reaching a distribution agreement
but we continue to try. When you compare what sexually oriented
materials are available and legal within Canada and what
they do not want to allow across their border, you begin
to sense that the issue is not about protecting Canadian
citizens from adult materials but about protecting their
own local adult entertainment industry. In other words,
they are making economic policy under the guise of morality.
To be even more blunt, the Canadian government has found
a way to violate the NAFTA treaty and feel self-righteous
in doing so!
Are
the "squirting" scenes in videos from In Joe's Living
Room the same as peeing?
Squirting refers to the act of "expelling the secretions
of the paraurethral glands," not the act of urinating. There
has been a lot of controversy in medical circles about the
existence and content of this female fluid. This topic is
often discussed in the alt.sex.wizards
newsgroup. Research has shown the chemical composition is
prostatic acid phosphatase and glucose, and some tests have
shown fructose, and a little bit of urea and creatinine.
It comes from glands surrounding the urethra called the
Skene's glands or the paraurethral glands. Stimulation of
the area of the Graffenberg spot or G-spot in some women
produces a paroxysmal emotional excitement which leads to
expelling this fluid from the urethra. If you really want
all the details, read our excerpts from a transcript of a CBC radio broadcast
from February 1995 which includes historical perspective,
medical descriptions, and actual techniques for achieving
female squirting. This broadcast dispels the myth that Canadians
are a puritanical bunch even if some of their customs agents
are.
Adult videos with squirting scenes are becoming increasingly
popular. While the videos offered at Patches' Place are
strictly amateur, the pros in adult entertainment are making
videos with squirting scenes also. We hope you will like
our amateur stars like Elizabeth better. She squirts more
fluid than most of the pros anyway and is very cute!
Do
you also have nude pictures available?
We didn't until we put Nissy's catalog online in June 1996.
Nissy wanted to have some captured pics from her videos
on her catalog page. We decided to go with a few pics that
are not too explicit. We have since added other pics to
our site.
We are concerned about the demands our Web sites put on
their servers and we try to keep graphics limited. We have
begun using progressive JPEGs which are mapped to a common
palette and then compressed to the maximum without losing
the palette. This keeps the pics we are adding quite small
in file size even if the pic is large.
Until all Web browsers are capable of using the Platform
for Internet Content Selection (or PICS rating system for
short), as implemented by the Recreational Software Advisory Council and used
by various software filtering programs, we will be concerned
about minors accessing our Web site. We are opposed to becoming
a pay site for members only and we are opposed to various
adult verification systems that other adult sites sometimes
use because they are slow and only exist to take your money
(and some even want to bribe us to help them take your money).
We believe the PICS rating system offers the greatest freedom
for us and the greatest privacy for you when you visit our
site.
Is
there any place where groups of people interested in watersports
can meet together?
We have heard there is a Watersports Club in Norway but
we don't have specific information on their meetings. We
have also heard that there is a group of watersports fans
who meet somewhere in the state of Washington in the US
but we do not have any details on this group either.
We do know that Peter
Love has expressed some interest in helping groups get
started with meetings that would function as a support group
and not a wild piss party. A new Web site in the UK has
opened as of July 1997 which sponsors a place where watersports
fans can get together for social times. This is similar
to the model of the Norwegian Watersports Club where members
meet together for picnics and social gatherings.
Why
did you set up this Web site?
To offer a service to newbies who miss stories posted in
the watersports newsgroups since no archive of these stories
exists on the Internet. Also, our web site serves as a place
to get information about various sexual topics and provides
information about amateur videos we have available which
are hard to find. Plus, I think of this web site as a place
to have fun and express my radical, weird, and wild humor!
Do
you have your own domain name now?
We tried to keep it quiet until we had it set up and ready
to go but word leaked out (pun intended) about it. As of
the beginning of August 1997, we have set up our own domain
as http://www.patches.net/ but it is not ready
for visitors yet. Since we know you will click on the link
anyway, we should warn you that the page is only designed
for Netscape 4.0 at the moment and it will display in some
strange ways with other browsers or even other versions
of Netscape.
You may wonder why we didn't choose the "com" designation
for our domain name. Well, you already know we are very
different from other adult sites on the Net and this is
just one more difference. We see Patches' Place as an "organization"
which provides information, education, and support for those
interested in watersports. We even decided to have some
fun with the "org" designation and expand it to ORGASM which
stands for "ORGanization for the Advancement of Sexual Micturition."
(That ought to confuse the would-be censors for a while.)
What
stories are available here?
The collection of stories is always growing. We have an
archive of many stories about watersports on the Watersports Stories List page.
We welcome suggestions for other well written stories to
be added. There are also stories and letters from various
magazines on the Magazines with Watersports Articles
page.
Are
the stories you have written true?
Except for stories labeled as fantasy, all my stories are
true. However, I admit I try to tell them in a way which
will add to the dramatic (erotic?) affect of the story on
the reader. Any of my stories labeled as humor are definitely
not true but just for fun!
Have
you ever had a pissing contest?
My roommate and I often had pissing contests with our guys
while we were at school. When we are not peeing our pants
but shooting for distance instead, we often beat the guys.
The only difference is we use two hands and they only have
to use one. Think about it! Since we graduated, got married,
and my former roommate moved to another city, my husband
and I usually have other forms of wet fun! I hope this doesn't
mean we are finally growing up!
We used to have pissing contests with all four of us to
see who could wet their pants first. One of us would set
the alarm on our wrist watch and the game was to see who
could make a wet spot on their pants first after the alarm
went off. Each of us won from time to time in this contest.
The last one to make a puddle had to clean up so the real
object was not to be the loser in this contest. (grin)
Is
there anything you haven't done?
Yes! Some day I want to go hang gliding. I want to soar
hundreds of feet above a major roadway and pretend I am
a rain cloud so people turn on their windshield wipers below
me. I also want to reach a orgasmic state where endorphins
are released in my brain at the same time. The trick will
be not to let go of the hang glider and crash! I really
wonder if it can be done and when I get up enough nerve,
I am going to try it!
What
was your major at school?
Many guys think I majored in marketing but they are wrong.
Divulging my major even after graduation could compromise
my anonymity so I will skip that question. Next?
When
is your birthday so I can send you a card?
If I told you my birthday, it might help you find me and
I want to stay anonymous. I have taken steps to conceal
my identity and the identity of close friends so none of
us can be harassed by close-minded, intolerant people who
might cause us trouble. Unfortunately, we live in a society
where some people think it is their duty to limit the freedoms
and rights of others when they do not agree with their beliefs
or actions. If you want to send me a birthday card, send
it to me on your birthday and we will both celebrate!
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